Health Plan Planner Gifts

'Jenkins won the health savings award with his suggestion that we have our employee hernia checks done at the airport by TSA agents.'

"We only got six days of funding."

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

When Engineers Crack.

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

'We took the old plan, folded in half, and now it's the new plan.'

"I think you might need to start again."

Innovation & Calculation

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

'We had no contingency plan for things going right.'

"We've waited twenty-five years to make this trip, and we're certainly not interested in getting there in any six and a half hours."

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

Engineer on the move.

Old woman with trolley full of medication.

Bathroom shelf full of clocks and pills.

"Do you cover hypochondria?"

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

"How the hell should I know what I'm looking at? You're lousy insurance doesn't provide HD X-rays."

"We're still trying to sort out the details."

Bad Office Planning

Father Time Management

Clear construction agreements are important.

"I thought an illogical framework would work better."

Medicare: More is Better!

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

'Steve, I admire your determination to make this plan work.'

'Company planning department'

"You should have purchased the extended warranty."

'The computer links me to other doctors, so I can see how much they're charging for tests.'

Popping an idea.

We find this model works better for us!

'It's bad enough we missed every deadline, but we're the long-range planning committee!'

'It's called lateral thinking.'