Health-conscious Spellcaster T-Shirts

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

Newt sale

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

'Beer brewery? No, I wanted the witches brew! Damn GPS.'

"What a load of hocus-pocus!"

Witches of Instagram

'Needs more kale.'

"At least she's reading."

Modern Witch Shoppe

Witches at a cauldron.

'Your resume looks good. Let me hear some of your incantations.'

"I can't use this. It's past its spell by date."

Hexercise.

'There's been an update. Instead of abracadabra, it's option/control key.'

'Side effects include, headache, dry mouth, muscle fatigue and turning into a frog.'

"Your're mum's well wicked."

My Cauldron Rules

"It's the witching hour somewhere."

'Of course it's lite. I wouldn't make it if it wasn't lite.'

'Mum, have you seen my pet lizard anywhere?'

"Remember my frog-slash-boyfriend? Well now he's my prince-slash-fiancé!"

"I can't remember if it's one eye of newt, or two... Hang on, I'll just take a look at my spell checker."

'We really need to upgrade our Pharmacy!'

'Well, since you put it like that, I suppose we could reduce the price of the property slightly.'

"I swear, you won't be able to tell the difference, plus, turkey eye of newt is much healthier for you."

'I suggest you stay out of this Wilco, lest aspersions be cast upon thee.'

Coven ready - Witch in supermarket with a 'coven ready' chicken

"You're leaving?" "Yeah, today's kids are so demanding so I've decided to move to a gluten-free, lactose-free, nut-free, sugar-free neighborhood."

Magic Mushrooms

"Does this poison smell weird to you?"