Health-conscious Snacker Gifts

"The only thing healthy in this corporate culture is the yogurt in that snack machine."

Tartine

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Rage.

But is it organic?

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

Love is when you watch television together.

"Is the MSG local?"

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

Budget Bureau. Ernie, spilling something from every food group on it, does not make it a "balanced" budget!

How The Sausage Is Eaten

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

"I'll have the egg-yellow omelette."

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

Supermarket - World Cup Specials

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

Pope tarts.

"Goal!"

Back in 5 minutes!

Sheltering in place.