Health-conscious Moviegoer Gifts

Theater Usher Moms.

'It was great. I hated it.'

Dating in 2020

You are very important to me!

Football fans in corona times

Now playing. Zombie Truck-Driving Maniacs II. If I'm too scared, can we cuddle. It's why I make him see these horrible movies.

Oh, oh... I detect traces of tree nuts... where's my epipen?

Kissing at the Movies

The big bad wolf uses an inhaler before he blows down the three little pigs' straw house.

"Other script ideas? Of course! I've been working on one about a killer plant and only your family and a lamp can stop it."

'Popcorn-Soda-Hankies'

'I don't know which is worse - the popcorn people spill on the floor, or the chicken poop.'

"Gawd! All that sex and violence - and that was just on the front row!"

Cult films!

Couple look at posters for Carbon Emission Impossible and Carbon Trading Places. Man says: 'Looks like Hollywood has spotted a bandwagon.'

'He huffed, and he puffed, and he blew the house in. Obviously a non-smoker.'

Tom Cruise Christmas Impossible

CENTER FOR DISEASE CONTROL, 'Emergency, sir! -- Hypochondria has reached epidemic proportions!'

"I like the part where she says, 'woof'."

'Forget it! -- the last time we rented 'Lassie Come Home,' you howled all night!'

'Your blood pressure is skyhigh! No more salt lick for you!'

Giraffe watching open air cinema without paying.

'How much eating time do I have left?'

They killed the monster!

"How many units of alcohol do you kid yourself that you consume weekly?"

Enjoying summer baseball, D-style.

Covid-19

"I can't watch these shows. Everyone's too...close together."

"What have you been up to? What clumsy cosmetic surgeon are you?"

Worms going to the cinema to watch a horror movie called "The Robin"

Guilt-relief olde grain cereal.

"Who asked for Steve Buscemi?"