Health Conscious Drinkers Pillows

"I gotta start taking better care of myself, Joe - you got any high-fiber whisky?"

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

'Look, you're just going to have to cut back. Times have changed. . . Today's kids are full of hydrogenated oils, trans fats, corn syrup, and all kinds of preservatives.'

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

Wash your hands

Running

I'd like a mocha almond vanilla latte...hold the coffee.

'Pumpkin pie isn't dessert. It's another vegetable.'

"I didn't ask to be made with seventeen grams of fat."

'My mother's resolution is to eat more vegetables, and my resolution is to help her by giving her mine.'

"She was really disappointed when she found out she was going to an eye doctor and not an iDoctor."

'I'm not feeling well. I think I've got human flu.'

'Is it organic?'

Spring.

"Okay, who hasn’t eaten a McDonald’s burger in the past two days?"

"Scientists have found out that drinking alcohol can be dangerous...well, water can be dangerous, too!"

'I havn't finished last years Marathon yet...'

"There. Straight from the organic veggie patch. The world's most expensive carrot."

'In that case I'll do nothing!'

"...and lay off the energy drinks..."

Football fans in corona times

"It's very important to wash your hooves!"

"I can't eat these nutrition bars. They're for women."

"Spring is in the air but it's December in my ABS."

'My prescription: digital textbooks.'

"So if I need to stop smoking and lose weight..what are you going to do about it?"

"Sorry sir - our sun screen only goes up to Factor - 100..."

'Test results are back. Coffee, donuts, sleep deprivation. Doc, you've got to start taking better care of yourself.'

"We're very green here, we recycle everything."

'If only you would let me cover this Tofu-vegetables stuff with ketchup, it would at least LOOK like real food...'