Health Anxiety Explorer Gifts

"Hypochondriac's handbook. A little passion project I'm working on;, or, rather, I would be working on."

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

The Chicken Who Crossed the Road, in therapy. My motives are always being questioned!

"Oh, please. Lord, no ... I'm only 50! No, please – anything but reading glasses!"

"But what if this is all there is?"

I read an article about the health benefits of dark chocolate so I make sure all the donuts I eat are covered with dark chocolate.

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

Free-Floating Anxiety

"Returning to standard time is always difficult. I gain an hour of worrying."

"Hell: The Airport"

Ed finally had to admit that his body was less of a temple and more of a worn-out parish church with a bouncy castle out front.

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

Unsmiley face at the psychiatrist...

Deep in the Heart of Texas: The Cholesterol Kid.

"If find people express themslves more freely in traffic jams."

Doctor to overweight patient: 'I assure you, stomach stapling is quite routine these days.'

Well, I feel a lot better - he says there's a method to my madness.

"So, Ms. Medusa. Let's talk about this fear of snakes you mentioned. Do you notice that it causes anxiety?"

"You call that worrying?"

'I can remember when paranoia was unusual.'

"Adolescence can be a very trying time, Mr. Alcorn."

'Guess what! I got my act together! And this is it!'

Caption Contest TK

"I'd consider taking out this appendix you'renot using and greatly expanding your kidney area."

Bird to psychologist: 'I have some deep-seeded issues.'

So, when did I realize I was a control freak, doc?…

"I feel we're almost down to bedrock, Mr. Bonwell."

"I can’t even find the motivation to quit my gym membership."

'My therapist cured me of using humour as a defence, these days I pack a .45.'

'I'm a billionaire, but I think like a millionaire.'

"My main worry is my anxiety."

"Then there was the dream where I woke up in a pool of melted butter."