Headhunting Gifts

'The Banks are keen to tap into your expertise.'

"Ironically, this is the living room."

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

"You're very lucky that gazelle gives me diarrhea."

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

"And where have you previously moused?"

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 9.

'I really don't think mouth-to-mouth wroks on fish, Ben.'

Duck Hunt

Deer Season Open.

'Now then - I just wanted to see how you handle pressure, Mr. Boyle.'

"Tallyho!"

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

"I warned you about the recoil on that one."

'Okay...3.5 billion in stock, 2.5 billion in cash, 80 million in deferred compensation, my own private jet, a luxury car lease for the next ten years, 3 club memberships and...

Bear Hugging Season Open

"Mom, I'm bored. Do you know something I can get hysterical and panicky about?"

'You're not supposed to catch them!'

"... and what’s even worse – I spilled my beer!"

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

'Give me your paw, Ben, please, give me your paw!'

"I'd go with you, but I'm a non-sporting breed."

'So who needs sonar?!'

'My 'What I Did Over The Weekend' report is about my hunting a 17,000 pound moose, deep inside Canada.Some or all of this report has been fictionalized for dramatic purposes.'

A Bloody Butcher

'Hey - my dad promised that I'd get a gun.'

'Missed again, eh, Bob? Maybe you should switch to decaf!'

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

'You caught it, you gut it!'

Pointing.