Head-bump Expert Gifts

'As avid soccer player, Roy head-bumps his playing partner's ball in for a birdie.'

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

He's slow and can't see out of one eye, but watch out for his left hook.

'Mom is feeling sick. She caught a baby.'

Speed bump in honor of JD Yomp 1866 - 1957...inventor of Asphalt

'Camel'

Ultra Sound/Downloading.

"Information is moved via neurotransmitters from neuron to neuron via the synapses into the brain where it is then retrieved by the memory via a slap on the back of the head."

"She's about to get him on the rebound."

Speed Bumps.

"My wife's going through a difficult pregnancy."

Caution: False Contractions Ahead

'Remember his weakness is a pulled tendon, so keep it as high as your bursitis will let you, but take it easy with your fast ball because of my bone chips.'

"Thanks for calling the celebration help desk. For assistance with high fives, press one now. For fist bumps, press two, for chest bumps, press three..."

Wall.

'Reading that stuff gives me 'goose bumps'.'

'And she's got the gall to call me chubby.' - Hubert's comment on a pregnancy.

"Don't you dare ask me again...ARE WE THERE YET??"

'Baby's kicking again.'

Please take a number...

The End is Not Near.

Do you have to do everything at the last minute?

'There! Did you feel him kick?'

Old woman staring at pregnant woman's bump.

"You may now fist pump the bride."

No, that one's not my hand, either.

"Every motorway in the country is clear except the southbound M3 which will remain at a standstill for the rest of the day."

'Slow down on the speed bumps, Harvey.'

'It happens every time I go over a bump.'

'I like a man with a good, firm fist bump.'

Traffic Jam.

Quickly realizing that her blind date was a dork, Amy began chewing on her emergency supply of garlic cloves.