Hawk Handler Pillows

"You ever look around for something, and then realize you were holding it?"

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

Fragile stamper.

Pushy Dog

'The word bath is mentioned.'

D.I.Y with dad.

"I'm interested in working with animals and deliveries."

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

'Rex! Have you been counting the sheep again?'

"There you go with that typical police mentality."

Saggy Boobs Make Great Bungee Ropes for Bored Hamsters.

'Bad news! We're hamsters!'

"3:14 p.m. Suspect drives to lakeside resort. Rents rowboat under false name. Tosses evidence into... wait, how do I tell anyone?" Topper: Undercover police dog

"Peter quickly learns the limitations of his new hamster ball."

A man with a bird perched on his finger.

'Ed' 'Op-ed'

I think you started off sending him the wrong message when you named him Alpha.

"She barks once for drugs, twice for weapons, and ten times for candy bars."

'Damn showdog people!'

'He's a sniffer dog-trained to sniff out dope.'

'I wish I could do Search and Rescue too: When you're a Police Dog, the people you find don't actually want to be found...'

"I lost my way and wandered through this white hell for five days before your brave rescue dog found me and saved me from starving to death!"

"Listen, buddy, a lot of dogs accidentally wee-wee at Westminster."

'Did you read my email about Timmy falling down the well?'

"Ok, it got weird while you were a wolf."

A recurring crisis at the Farkinski farm

"Yeah, but it doesn't smell like a bomb!"