Halftime Strategist Pillows

'See you at halftime.'

"We'll swop at half time."

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'Let's go over our secret play.'

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

"Stag poker"

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'

Snail Coach

Isn't there something about this in th Geneva Convention

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning

"Watch his feet - if he doesn't step into the throw, he's going to fake it."

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

'I only come to the game for the half time entertainment and snack bar privileges.'

"You'll come? Great." "The Hendersons will be too." "We'll kill them at poker." "Phil and Edna, planning a murder for later that night."

'I thought you wanted to get more involved with sports.'

'Governor game change and his replacement debate moderators...'

"We'll see who wins on Sunday, and more importantly, if we'll hear 'Not Like Us' at halftime."

'Yes, Bob, Allan's wife did let him buy tickets to the big game, but then Allan didn't spend all his allowance on nachos and beer, now, did he?'

'Ring around the rosey ...'

Basketball Players Working Together

'Wanna play? We need another body... er... one more player.'

With the Inflatable Pocket Potty, you'll never have to wait in line again at the stadium.

'After all these years of purposely losing to the boss, I beat the pulp out of him and turned in my resignation.'

'Can't it wait until halftime?'

"A four-year, $60 million contract and he can't even do a decent end-zone dance!"

"She's a little overworked but, depending on what happens next Sunday, I'll probably jump back on."

"So hardly working....or hardly working?"

Putting out on the green is called 'The Short Game'.

The baseball players psychiatrist.

'Psst - my wife works part time for the IRS!'