Playoff Strategist Pillows

"Wow! I think you just moved up in the playoffs, Tom!"

The MBA Draft

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

Perils of the double play.

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

'What are we, wimps? Are we gonna let a bunch of rabbits push us all over the field? Come on, big guys.'

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

The Other Cooperstown

'Let's go over our secret play.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

"Stag poker"

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"I love fast break business success."

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

Baseball Clubhouse Pranks

'Are you blind ref?'

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'

'Here's a play my backup QB designed. Everyone goes long and I throw to our opponent.'

"Marketing hired a golf pro as our spokesperson. Finally, we've got someone on the ball around here."

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning