Haircut Avoiders T-Shirts

'I don't need a haircut. I just want you to use the vacuum thingy on my neck for 20 minutes.'

Haircuts

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

"Absolutely not!"

"Can you give me a haircut that says, 'If you mess with my budget I'll rip out your soul, wring it like a dish towel, and drink it from a teacup'?"

'That's Oog -- he got a haircut and a job.'

'That'll be four thousand and eighty pounds please'

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

I cut my own hair — using a drone.

Military style hedgehog

'There! Now you won't get tangles!'

"We have a very special relationship with our barber."

Two men in barber shop

Sheep are sheared and then shown a mirror.

"...and yes, you did take too much off the top!"

"Oh, stop whining. We ALL need a haircut."

Bobo's Barber Shop

'My dad cut it. My mother repaired it. Now, I'm looking for some professional maintainance.'

"Haircuts...cast out evil thoughts..."

"Number two all over but leave it shaggy on top"

"Well sir. . . you could have a crew cut, flat top, a stiff quiff, a hi-top fade. . . "

'It's not flying I'm afraid of -- it's driving to the airport!'

'Daddy! Are you using the number forty clipper?'

'Just the usual, thanks.'

'His mother wants to know if you'll give him a haircut after you remove his tonsils.'

"Can you just give me a quick trim?"

Child cutting her brother's hair

Man to man: 'I turned down a raise because I'm afraid of heights.'

"Why, thank you, sweetheart!"

Barber has strapped boy in barber chair with a safety belt.

'Every year I say, 'Just a little of the top' but they never listen.'

'No, I don't like dancing.'

"Keep it long at the back and big and bushy on top please."

'Wow, you got Bob! Lucky you, he's definitely the best shearer around!'

House of Java.net Cybercafe. Open mike night starring Rudy Park. Much to fear, these troubled days. Covid, economy in a stew … I've compounded things a ways with my enemy anew. Oh foolishness and great folly there're no ifs, ands, or buts. We failed to tip sufficiently … when last at Supercuts. Never dis the barber!