Haiku Fanatic Gifts

'I think exposure to Haiku has really sharpened my tweeting skills.'

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

Showbiz Awards

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

"Hugh fans!"

"Heads up! It's another tidal wave of overwrought critical hyperbole!"

Musical notes bubble gum.

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

'I don't have any formal training, but I do own the complet boxed set of 'Get Smart' DVD's.'

"It's a Haiku Dinner."

"This is crazy! We've been here only 10 minutes, we've spent all our money, and we've got nothing to show for it!"

Mother Goose's Haiku

The Quotable Ben Franklin. To lengthen thy life, lessen thy meals. And not flying thy kite during thunderstorms might help, too!

Intellectual Foreplay...

“So let me get this straight: George Clooney isn’t your leader?”

Poetry repairman

Chris O'Dowd

"How is it that Mick Jagger still has the energy to be Mick Jagger, but you're exhausted just from being you?"

The boy who cried Wolf Blitzer,

"We can do this the easy way or the Hitchcockian way."

This year I thought I'd give up something different so I've given up writing Haiku poetry.

Vincent Van Goth.

"... Er, Houston... It would appear that there is life on Mars, after all!"

Nikolai Gogol

Knight

"Thar be an Hallowe'easter a blowin'."

"Is this Haiku poopery?"

"The first rule of mime club is: You don’t talk about mime club."

"I appreciate succinct memos, Phillips, but stop writing them all in Haiku!"

'The stuff legends are made of'

'To save time, I'll deliver the annual report in the form of a Hiaku.'

"A road yet uncrossed, My heart takes wing at the sight - The journey is life."

'She's got a speech impediment.'

"In the beginning was the word. Bubba bubba bubba, bird bird bird, bird is the word."