Habitual Procrastinator Gifts

"Shannon, some work wound up on my desk again."

"It's OK to close tabs. Just click on it. Once you realize that you don't need that many open, it'll get easier. You can do this!"

'Truth? I am just looking out the window...'

"He's declared it an area of natural beauty"

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.

Travelogue

'So how do you manage such a close shave?' 'Simple,i wait till the very last second.'

The Forever Stamp

'A cyber-terrorist stole my homework. I have a note from the CIA. '

"Have you ever had one of those days when it would have been easier just to do some work?"

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

'I prefer to work vicariously as opposed to remotely.'

Working from home to-do list.

Lazy man contemplates the moment of creation.

"Shouldn't you be studying?

"My five least favorite words in the world: By End of the Day Friday!"

The meeting will start a little late, intelligence is lost in the building somewhere.

'Tony says he'll marry you when he gets back from his poker run. It totally slipped his mind that it was this weekend.'

"I hate going into a staff meeting without a clear exit strategy."

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

The Procrastinatorium.

'Sorry I'm late getting home from work. I overslept.'

"How about fashionably never?"

"Thanks for coming in on the weekend....although let's admit it, you took a nap at your desk that happened to last all night..."

Bummer Time Streaming

Trust your instinct...listen to that little haunting voice that gives you subtle messages...'call in sick.'

List of things to do today. Make list of things to do tomorrow.

I was a day late and a dollar short, but it was a personal best!

Thanks for making the breakfast meeting, Harris.

"The Procrastination World Championships were only a month away. He never trained so hard."

"A 15 page 'to do' list is a 'don't do' list."

She realised it would be foolish to start a diet with third cousin Rodney's retirement party due in only 12 years.

Rip van Winkle goes back to the office/

"I don't understand it - no matter how much I drink coffee, play on my phone, refresh my e-mail, look up things online, go to the kitchen for snacks, message my friends, scroll through Twitter, and play with the cats, I still can't get any writing done."