Guitar Groupie Pillows

"Here's another I wrote about pawning my guitar because I don't make enough writing songs."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

Theatre Crowd

Dynamite little combo

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

Justice 4 Ron

Internet Cafe.

'Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard.'

Robert Schumann

'Could you guys play a slow number so my gal and I can dance?'

Emily's Slow Food Restaurant.

'I have Tourette's, and they play backup.'

'I'm with the band.'

"If they shorten political campaigns, what will we do for entertainment?"

'We've had an application from No.10 Downing Street. . . they need to extend their cabinet room.'

The worship singer suspects someone doesn't appreciate his talent after finding his mic muted for the 3rd time.

Artwork in a gallery still has wet paint.

"You want England to win what!? Put me back in the lamp!"

"I don't have a good ear. I should really invest in an air guitar tuner."

"In the Game of Life, my son, the fix is in."

"You're dragging the beat."

'Yes, you do always take me to the best restaurants. But, I always pay the bill!'

Revisionist Theology Happy Hour in Galilee with Jesus and Judas

"He's been watching all those cookery programmes."

"I'd like a table near the band please."

"I have two children by a previous tour."

Team Bass