Guardian Gatekeeper Giggler Gifts

'Sorry -- we're overstocked on bald guys right now.'

Kid tows his large dog in wagon with 'wide load' sign.

J. Wilbert Dentist - Sorry We're Open

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

'He never listened to his mother!'

'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

'Ok...something, but nothing you'd care about. Honest!'

"Hey, there's a spare key hidden under this cloud!"

"Your PA isn't due up here for another 27 years. You'll just have to answer the questions yourself."

In the houseplant cemetery.

'Polly wants a machine gun.'

"Pop, what part of ‘rest in peace’ don’t you understand?!"

'I suppose technically you're right. But we still prefer not to think of it as a gated community.'

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

'Seriously, Earl, if you say you've got a bone to pick with me one more time, I'm out of here.'

Dog steals a bone from a cemetery.

"She always said she'd only share this recipe over her dead body."

Man at Heaven's gate with different college letter than St. Pete

"So for you being buried alive was largely a negative experience?"

'I assume you have paper work to back up all these time travel business expenses.'

Burke and Hare and Hare

"It was three hours before we realised that he wasn't playing dead."

Heaven Security Checks.

"Go on in. You're the first onslaught."

"Actually, I'm just the night manager here."

Punch in the churchyard

'He really wanted to be cremated. . .'

'McNulty never subscribed to the theory that he couldn't take it with him.'

Palindrome grave

Grave with satellite dish.

"Too righteous?"

"Hold on—I forgot to stamp your hand."

"I don't care if you are the invisible man, sir, I can't let you in if you're not wearing a tie!"