Gatekeeper's Helper Gifts

St Peter shaving the heads of angels

"All we have left is standing room only."

"You're a physician? Let me ask you about a problem that I've been having."

Extra Long-jump

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

"Hey, there's a spare key hidden under this cloud!"

"Your PA isn't due up here for another 27 years. You'll just have to answer the questions yourself."

'I suppose technically you're right. But we still prefer not to think of it as a gated community.'

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

Man at Heaven's gate with different college letter than St. Pete

Heaven Security Checks.

"Actually, I'm just the night manager here."

"Go on in. You're the first onslaught."

'I assume you have paper work to back up all these time travel business expenses.'

'Do you have a reservation?'

"Hold on—I forgot to stamp your hand."

"I don't care if you are the invisible man, sir, I can't let you in if you're not wearing a tie!"

Folsom Prison - A Gated Community

"I know it looks a little rough but we're having all the puffy stuff reupholstered this week."

Freedom of information

"There's a man here who wants to add insult to injury."

Beware Of The Hog...

'It's a cease and desist order. States that we can't keep anyone out. It's based on the ruling: The more the merrier.'

"I'm sorry, but Mr. Barclay is not putting up with people like you anymore."

"It's a no-go area."

Heavens gate 'Please enter, Do not fear to tread'

'The only difference between you and me, Flanders, is that I read the homework before I ate it.'

Gateway to Mr. Beck

I can't see him - can I take a message?

"You had the most toys but you didn't win."

'Sorry -- we're overstocked on bald guys right now.'

Welcome to Flower Ridge - Traditional values strictly enforced.