Group Therapy Joke Lover Gifts

"Now, Og...what did we agree on about passing the talking stick?"

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

Beer $.50. I've had lot of psychological therapy, but none of it seems to help. Maybe you

"Albert the Great—what a joke."

"Why can’t this count as ‘date night’?"

'Care to join in some of my avoidance behaviour?'

'Pencil on couch being psycho analysed.'

'We're like one big family tree... that's why everyone is in therapy.'

Psychiatrist: Mind over matter filing trays.

"Why do you feel like you're lost?"

"The fact that I have multiple personalities and none of them are computer literate is depressing."

"Frankly, I just want to talk about how great I am non-stop and uninterrupted for 50 minutes every week on a long term basis."

'Life's little wonders are too big for me.'

"I feel proud of the success I've made, thanks for all your support."

'I may not really need you. My imaginary friend is a psychiatrist.'

"No heroic measures."

Let's try something new, Al. I'll say a word, then you remain mercifully silent for the rest of the hour.

"About that insomnia...have you tried counting billable hours?"

"Since you ask, when I'm through here I go home and listen to a bunch of mindless crap on TV."

"Gorg, you've got to let yourself evolve!"

"You dawdle, daydream. You make lists of things to do but can't get started. You seem to be restricted from doing what you know you should be doing. These problems will dissolve when you read Chapter Ten of my new book, at eight dollars and ninety-five cents."

"This obsession of yours about becoming a car mechanic..."

'Group hug anyone?'

"Would it be possible to speak with the personality that pays the bills."

Cut out and keep your own Freud.

'It's not my childhood that traumatised me. It's the size of your bills.'

'Yes, we are going in circles. How do you feel about that?'

'I think Mr. Teddy's getting too dependent on me.'

'I'm becoming predictable.'

"You do realise that you are not the only client scheduled this morning?"

I always felt I should have been born into royalty, Doctor Kapuchnik. If it's any consolation, Al, you're a royal pain.

Mathematician on the couch.

"I guess I'll never understand women."