Grog Guzzler Gifts

White Whale Brand Grog

Sailors on Shore Carousing - As it will be when the grog is stopped.

Moo! OOM!

"I'm a stay-at-work dad."

Oil shock.

'You said I should check back with you if I didn't get any better. . .'

Gas tank is holding up a customer for money 'Fill 'er up!'

"Let me guess...you forgot to put their hand-brakes on!"

'Henri! We found your sweatband!'

Thank you for not droning on about the English

"Hey Frank, how was your colonoscopy?" "In and out."

Saxophone summoning.

Gas bar, Full service/Self-serving tightwads

Gatorade!

"Perhaps you slept SLOWER than usual..."

I can't think of anything more embarrassing than wearing one of these stupid gowns.

'Hey, you should be thanking us for improving your cluster-to-leaf balance.'

'Yes,I'm wearing clean underwear.Why do you ask?'

Addiction: high gas prices.

"It's best just to leave them alone - Over the years, they've come to regard themselves as an elite group of drunks."

"Hey, Robinson Crusoe! Taking the laundry to mommy? Wow, you sure know how to 'rough it'! Haha!!" "Just ignore them." "Can you bring us back some of her blueberry pie? Ha!"

"Let it run slow. I love to hear the gurgle and splash."

'Ordinarily, that wouldn't bother me, except Doc did the same blindfold trick last week, when he did my colonoscopy.'

"Shadow? Why would I be scared of my shadow? I thought it was the IRS."

"You say you were robbed? Could you describe the culprit?"

"I don't want to buy a car just fill up my own"

"The government has sent some guidelines as to how er can cut our carbon footprint down..."

Techno Geeks.

"Stop eating you greens!"

A New Test.

"The Sullivans have food allergies. Did you remember to bring your own gluten?"

Please do not adjust your mirror.

Gas Prices.

Why the modern day 'Prodigal Son' won't get far.

"Oh boy! Burritos!"