Grocery Humor Fan Pillows

'We're out of peanut butter.'

Filet minion

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

'I love this supermarket; they have the easiest to understand wine department.'

'Can we get the corn that's already been chewed?!'

'Look, Mum, those loaves have had some babies!'

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

'I thought a perfect martini would cover the 'well balanced' requirement of my night to cook.'

'The stuff legends are made of'

'Well, fancy meeting you here.'

"The other waiters just spit in the food of rude customers, not in their faces!"

'So this is a kitchen!'

Low income vampires.

Free Range / Deranged

Self Checkout

That was 16 items.

The Cheese God

"I say my dear, would you pass me some ice please - the fresh stuff, not that frozen rubbish."

New: imitation spaghetti - Impasta.

Little Miss Muffet in Store.

"Hate to break it to you, buddy, but I'm your better in every way - spicier, zestier, more fun, and Latino."

"Mmm. The soup du jour is not cream of mushroom. It is not tomato or celery, it is not chicken, nor is it Scotch broth. It is most definitely not won ton..."

RADA canteen, "Lead roll, support rolls"

"People take it more seriously than 'Please don't pinch the peaches'."

'This is quite common. You've eaten so many sausages that you've turned into one.'

'Spaghetti dinner. Hold the garlic bread.'

"I'm still trying to get used to ordering food online."

'Look, I didn't know they had salad bars on these flights...'

'Is this milk fresh?' - 'An hour ago it was grass.'

"Are you gonna eat that garlic bread?"

'Notice: results of new studies: most of what was good for you is bad for you - most of what was bad for you is good for you'

"I miss my mom's home-cooked methamphetamine."