Grinch Sympathizer Pillows

"Why can't you enjoy christmas like everyone else."

"Same every year, he gets all tensed updreading the first radio blast of Slade's 'It's Christmas'..."

"Merry Christmas. You Cheerful, Chirpring, Cheeping, Tweeting, Tw*ttering, Twittering Tw*t!"

"I'm the bad guy..."

'I hate all holidays!'

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

"The government doesn't understand me."

'He's determined not to enjoy himself this Christmas.'

"Here! Drink your coffee... Honestly, you can be such a bear in the morning!"

"Code blue! Code blue! His heart's grown three times it's size!"

"I've never hated Christmas, just people."

'If you can hear me, Larry Gligstein, please send a text to 555-703-7193

"I hurt a lot of people during my last twelve steps."

"I just keep getting this urge to say 'Bah Humbug'!"

The Downside Of Being Superman, The Man Of Steel

Instead of feeling sorry for yourself. . .feel sorry for those who have to work with you!

The hardest instrument to play second fiddle.

'Ms Phelps, can you help me? I seem to have misplaced my Christmas spirit.'

I hate to tell you this, but most of the pigs on social media are rooting for the wolf.

"Stop trying to change me!!"

Sauron's Sore Eye

A man goes insane from receiving too many ties.

'Let's go home, coach. If God was going to intervene with a miracle and change the final score to save your job, it would have happened by now.'

Soccer wins more attention than baseball in Cuba

"Maybe we should skip caroling this one."

'Blast these cuts!'

"What happened, honey? Was your team defeated again?"

'December 25, in a far-off, heathen land...' 'What I would give for a day off this time of year.'

Christmas: "Let's open some more next week."

"All done with that holiday spirit for another year, are we dear?"

'There it is again...that mysterious feeling that we're clipped from a newspaper and hung on someone's refrigerator.'

"What do you mean I hurt his feelings?! He's a robot! He doesn't have any feelings!"

Christmas - Let's get it over with.

They killed the monster!

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: 'Here kitty...here kitty...'