Green Humor Pillows

'It is fuel efficient, but my ego feels crunched.'

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

'I got tired of wet feet all the time.'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

"Of course it's not clean energy -- We don't have clean ANYTHING!"

'I don't give advice. I'm only up here because it's safer.'

Tomorrow's world 2165.

'...and this is the water garden...'

Warning! Stay off the biotech lawn.

'It's self cleaning, and runs on natural gas.'

"This is a terrible table!"

It's on. My new favorite game show! Welcome to: Garbage, recycling or compost?! Dana from New York you can walk away with $10,000 or try to double the green! Double, please. Okay, Dana, here's your object: A takeout container from a local restaurant. Garbage, recycling or compost? Geez. I'm guessing it would depend on whether it's got some cardboard or it's fully biodegradable. Final answer? Recycling. Wrong. Garbage! I knew it. Ridicule her! You've lost your green, loser! I'm sorry. I try so ha

"Rising sea levels."

"You're not helping the methane problem, you know."

Shipwrecked with an environmentalist.

'There! another batch of clean coal.'

"Will this global warming mean we'll have longer summer vacations?"

You Are Here.

Perfect solution. Free street lighting, and we sell the surplus to the national grid.

An snail shell with a chimney

'Oops, sorry!'

The Ultimate Green Office!

World of Cow - Goldfish aren't the only ones to grow into their environments.

"Let's not migrate, and just say we did.;"

'The only problem with solar powered air conditioners is finding a long enough extension cord.'

"No, I don't recycle."

'What we have to do is utilize some pollution control equipment in our manufacturing of pollution control equipment.'

Now do you believe in global warming?!

'It's not you...it's your carbon footprint!'

Just think! If the mall goes bust, what happens to all that paved-over land? Save our mall. We could roll up the asphalt and start a huge nature preserve. What about current wildlife? Hmm�You're right. I don't think the endangered species act covers mall rats.

Prepare to meet thy recycler.

'I worry that the warm glow from your sense of smug self-satisfaction could be harming the environment.'

'I'd heard that they like to source their food locally'

Soup art attack