Green Economy Gifts

Labour pledge u-turn

The Environmentalist

Rare earths are the key to a greenwashed, technotopian future

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

"We finally reached net zero emissions."

Rudolph goes green (compact flourescent nose)

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

Don't let the woodcutters get too close or they'll make a fuel out of you!

"I do miss trees but I don't miss the raking."

'You have to Marvell eh - 'annihalating all that's made to a green thought in a green shade.''

"Of course it's not clean energy -- We don't have clean ANYTHING!"

"Yes, also it keeps you fit."

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

Environmentalist Brainstorm

'And the best thing about this electric thermal underwear is, no batteries, it's solar!'

'It's a bold initiative but I don't think it's right for the staff kitchen.'

"Sorry, Rudolph, but the production on electric reindeers and their batteries gives work to thousands of children while you destroy the climate with your farts."

'Have you done something to your air? You look different?'

Environment policy.

'Doesn't it feel good to be taking care of our planet?'

'It's not as picturesque as the old steeple but it's saving a fortune in electricity bills!'

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

Dept. Sustainable Energy.

A globe detaches itself from its stand and falls into a rubbish bin in the offices of the (fictional) Institute of Environmental Forecasting

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

'It runs on batteries. I'm trying to become more green.'

Climate Change -- You are here.

'There's a renewable source the government should use.'

'We are an environmentally sensitive organization. We will have to do a background check on the size of your carbon footprint before we can make an offer of employment.'

'An aerosol? Are you sure you've thought this through?'

"The good news is, the wind turbine is working great, the bad news is, it blew all the solar panels off the roof."

'It's only now that we've chopped down all of the trees that we can see the damage we've done'

'Look on the bright side: now we qualify for an energy-conservation award.'

"At least their bull sessions are green. Everything they say is 100% biodegradable."