Green Building Specialist Gifts

'Yeah, there's a gentleman here who says he's come to caulk where others have been too afraid to caulk.'

This will be an environmentally sound house built entirely from trees that fell over naturally from old age.

"Our detractors call it suburban sprawl, but I prefer thinking of our plan as 'sustainable over-development!'"

Nuclear generation of energy.

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

Global Warming Coming Soon!

'It's hard to believe this is just an atrium.'

Another environmentally correct office product: The executive desk/organizer-fish ladder

Dept. Sustainable Energy.

Tomorrow's world 2165.

'Since hooking our generators up to your exercise machines, we've cut our fuel consumption by 25.'

Two 'superheros' show the discrepancy in toilet paper production.

"We ran the numbers on how climate change will affect economic growth, but the numbers got so spooked they just kept running."

Alderman shocked at a proposal to pull down Temple Bar

The Mafia Goes Green.

Grocery Store - Warning: Contents may be hazardous to your health

"It's got everything: northern exposure, hardwood floors, central tree."

"Gracie, people don't understand how hard things used to be. Sure, we can be green and throw out the washing machines...but then we'd have to load up the dirty clothes, drive the car to the river, and wash everything with rocks!"

Reason # 23 that doors don't make perfect seal against winter winds: Mischievous unemployed elves.

"It's powered by clean hydroelectricity from Norwegian fjords and built from 100% recycled shopping bags. We call it the Smugmobile!"

Too much packaging

'They've done wonders with Energy Efficiency!'

"Here's your gift. It's made from 100% recycled materials."

'Just because we're green doesn't mean we're green.'

'Everything here is organic, free range, naturally produced, locally sourced, pesticide free, minimally packaged and fairly traded - and yet, ironically, I am a complete bastard.'

Recycling Bin in Operating Theatre

"More versatile than you think - the building is made of tofu."

You should all get along beautifully. Fred handles toxic wastes, Doris works at a nuclear reactor, and Walter just isn't taking any chances.

Deforestation

Green Construction, 1/3 less 2 X 4s than our regular construction.

The World's First Condominium Complex Built on Landfill Created From Shredded Documents

'I worry that the warm glow from your sense of smug self-satisfaction could be harming the environment.'

"I know it's made of tofu, Paul, but you're missing the point."