Grape Grower Guru T-Shirts

Grape vines think alike.

The Vineyard

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

Wine Lady

Gardener Cutting Tree into 'Rock' Symbol.

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

Dog in Daisys

'Oh Hi!'

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

'Burying things is his version of spring cleaning.'

'I'd forgotten how lovely it looks outside!'

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

Giant slug attacks a city

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

"The trees are laughing at us."

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

"Hmmm ... perhaps a pinot noir less spilly?"

Man with wine glass face looks unhappy.

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

The Professor was a brilliant botanist but a hopeless photographer.

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

"Mother! How? Wait — where’s Dad?!"

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

'Worms? Have you tried Snyder's mulch pile?'

"Fido's determined to find that bone."

'Are you sure this wine is ten years old?' - 'Yes, I remember opening it ten years ago.'

'I've written six books on wine; owned my own winery and taught a wine class for two years. My next goal is to taste some.'