Grape Fanatic T-Shirts

'You know why he married a vintner's daughter? He thought she was di-vine.'

Pete Townshend Vineyards

Wine Lady

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

Wine enthusiast tries to make his way to Cork.

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

'This is the last time we hire former Cirque du Soleil members as stompers.'

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

Man with wine glass face looks unhappy.

"My wife commissioned a portrait of me."

A giant glass of red wine

"I'm just having fruit for dinner. Well, mostly grapes. OK, all grapes. Fermented grapes. I'm having wine for dinner."

'Are you sure this wine is ten years old?' - 'Yes, I remember opening it ten years ago.'

"I had a Caesar salad for lunch, but that was two days ago."

An Excellent Nose for Wine.

Wine tasting

'Now forget that I'm your boss and the CEO. How does my new product idea, Just the Lees, taste?'

'I, Dom Perignon, will now uncork the very first bottle of Champagne. Of course, I'm just guessing this is the right way to do it.'

"Thanks for inventing the god Dionysus. Now the whole country has a reason to drink more wine."

"I spent all day looking for this Malbec, not that anybody cares."

"Soy milk and rice milk are okay but I prefer grape milk.".

I never heard of chunky style wine. I couldn't find any seedless grapes.

"This family-owned boutique wine is produced from a single grape."

"Hints of migrant workers on the nose."

'Hey, if they can grow in Michigan...'

Cover Design for the Savoy (No. 4)

'Okay, you've got a mouthful of minerals, grapefruit, herbs and grass. Is it starting to taste like a sauvignon blanc?'

Schoolboy with lunch box.

'Bruce! 'ow many times must I tell 'ya? Only one wave of the bloomin' terroir flag over the fruit!'

"To tourists this just looks like a pile of rotten and damaged grapes. But here at Trendy Vineyards, we look at it and see Special Select Reserve."

'I think we can skip the resume.'

"And would you like a wine stopper?"

"Grapes are my favorite fruit too."