Grandchild's Early Milestones Gifts

'My grandson has been walking from an early age. . . Oh yes, in fact, by the time he was two he'd been walking three years.'

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

When a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

"When did she start crawling?"

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

'At lone at last.'

'It was the little darling's first time sitting up at the dining table!'

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

'Baby's first two-step.'

His first conspiracy theory...'Is it a coincidence the first time I walk, they start locking all the cupboards? I think not!'

One!

Sigh … They grow up so fast, don't they?

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

"Wait! I don't want to be disease resistant!"

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: This is solids?

"No, it's still just a thirst for spaghettios."

"As it's your birthday, would you like to go in the Big Chair?"

Eagle parenting.

'I think you're ready for the big chair...'

'He's my personal potty trainer.'

Sparkler

'We think he has a future in politics.'

Dominant hand reveal party

"Charles, look! He’s sending his first text!"

"We're a great team, Sash—you with your small and large motor skills, me with my spatial awareness and hand-eye coördination."

'His next appointment is on the 17th when the clock's little hand is on the two and the big one's on the nine.'

'There's been no stopping him since he said his first word this morning!'

'Jimmy made his first blog post today.'

'How old? He's 14 months, 3 days, 7 hours and 16 seconds... 17... 18...'

"I'm too old for baby limas."

'What do you think you're up to?'

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.