Grammar Lover Gifts

The Comma Sutra

A Puppet Named Juan

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

Thru versus Through Traffic

I will study my speling words...

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Big Tex Silver Saddle Restaurant advertises 'BBQ, $10, Chatter in a Vanishing Regional Dialect $1.00 Extra.'

Punctuation Police

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

A Copy Editor and His Dog

'Mr. Dawson, about when I said 'don't pull any punches'...'

Someone who knows apostrophes

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

'The Questioner'

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

Wok. Don't Wok.

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

'Roget it's fantastic, superb, extraordinary...where on earth did you get the idea?'

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.