Graduation Memorabilia Gifts

"If you buy the service plan, we can change the graduation date as often as neccessary."

Eternal Student.

"Class of 2008, never let the excuse 'I can't find my pants' stand in the way of your dreams."

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

U of Debt

Graduates on their phones

His Master's Thesis.

"The state of graduates literacy levels is shoking and both my colleegs agrree that there maths isn't much better."

"No, I'm not the first in my family to attend college. But I am the first at an Ivy."

'I had no idea there would be a test.'

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

"Quit your whining... Someday you'll appreciate affordable student housing."

"I've decided to major in engineering...college loan debt restructuring."

'So far more education hasn't helped me get a job. I think I'll get some student loans and get some more education.'

'Do you know how much it cost me to LEARN all this psychobabble?'

"Oh, it's a grand day for Harvard!"

"I wish I'd failed my 11 Plus too...."

Now Firing.

'Perfect - as Sir will know, the fashion is for the looser suit this year...'

Student Debt

School of Baristas

Obedience School. So, are you considering any post-grad work?

Actually, with bachelors degrees in philosophy, we were lucky to get this job.

"Yale law....where did you do your pre-hell?"

"This is not the first time I have been asked to speak."

Principal: 'Is THERE a DOCTORATE in the House?!'

'I was given a ton of great career advice when I graduated from college. Unfortunately, I can't remember any of it because my entire brain is filled with passwords and PIN numbers.'

The Artificial Intelligentsia

"I didn't it, I read it, so guess who just graduated cum laude from Dinsdale High?"

"Yale mom. Yale grandpa. Yale estranged creepy uncle."

Cards for All Occasions. Wedding. Get Well. Grads. Congrats. Friendship. Birthday. One "graduation" and one "condolences" … He's afraid of the real world.

Bank Student Loan Dept. You're only repaying a small fraction of your student loans? Yeah, because at this point I've forgotten almost everything I learned in college.

'You borrowed $27,000 over the years to study computer sciences. According to our files, you now owe us $1.83.'

A Guide to Academic Gowns and Hoods