Graduation From Philosophy School Gifts

'Idealist'

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

Vote Centrist to Keep Things Exactly as Awful as They Are

Pinocchio's Second Realization

Scientists are sexy

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

'So what are you studying, young man?'

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

"When I get to Heaven, will I still have to clean my room?"

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

"Smoke a cigar that fits your face."

'It's the moral highground occupation force.'

Teacher's sign in Philosophy class reads: 'Think', Sign in Science class reads 'Thunk' as student falls over.

Student - Haven't emailed in 2 days.

Philosophy Test Today. This "Meaning of Life" question -- is that essay or true-false?

"OK...for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

'Do you know how much it cost me to LEARN all this psychobabble?'

'Well, so my grades are A,B,C,D... at least I'm learning my alphabet.'

"It was Socrates, wasn't it, who said, 'The unexamined life is not worth living'?"

Lost and Profound.

math faculty

'Heidegger-Hi!'

Starving Philosophy student grappling with the question of the toast in the machine.

"He'll read some Marx and some Freud, and he'll buy some stock. Then he'll read some Plato and some Tolstoy, and he'll sell some stock."

"Must be the new philosophy teacher."

Academic Affairs: The Chair of Philosophy Corners the Chair of the Sciences

'Actually, I became a psychiatrist because the voices told me to.'

'So, in college what did you major in' - 'Business poetry.'

Door sign states: Reincarnation studies Come again ... and again.

"I'm in a molting period. I'm shedding all of my French philosophers."

Department of Philosophy. Free Why-Fi.

'Take two a day and in a couple of years you'll be a pharmacist!'