Graduating From Pharmacy School Pillows

'Take two a day and in a couple of years you'll be a pharmacist!'

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

Dancing Doctor

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

"All my symptoms are old ... "

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

'Well, what do I have?...Within reason, of course.'

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

'My medical school believed laughter is the best medicine.

Toy Shops and Educated Children

'Hello, I'm Dr. Frank Stein and this is my anaesthetist, Dr. Ivan Gore. We'll be doing your hernia operation tomorrow.'

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

Dog forced to return bone

I need to set upmy own company.

'It may be more inconvenient, but the 'Reverse Prostate Exam' is a lot less embarrassing for the both of us.'

'That was creepy. They ran short on cadavers, so we operated on the dean of students.'

'Good thing it has a child-proof cap.'

'What's holding him up?'

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

'The doctor will acknowlege your existance now.'

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

"Gross."

En garde!

"It's interpret-your-own-test-results day today."

"She keeps getting a stitch in her side."

Department of Nanotechnology