Graduation From Medical School Pillows

"First, do no harm. After that, go nuts."

'How did you become a doctor?' - 'I started as a patient and worked my way up.'

Medical students learning how to perform a prostate examination.

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

'Hippocrates wraps up his first press conference...'

'No, no, no. Shout 'clear' BEFORE zapping him.'

'I would have come to you sooner, but you hadn't graduated from medical school yet.'

"...and I'd like to thank all my patients for being so ill..."

"Well, there's nothing in the rules that says baboons can't perform surgery, so what the hey, let's give him a shot."

Doctor's diplomas: 'M.D., Surgery, Second Opinions.

Neurosurgery correspondence school diploma on the wall of a surgery center.

'I have a terrible headache!'

'An 'A' in penmanship. There goes my career as a doctor.'

Covid pinata

"These new coats are a Godsend."

"This giant chunk of my salary goes to student loans, this chunk goes to malpractice insurance, and this giant chunk goes to taxes. All I'm asking is to increase this tiny sliver of actual free and clear income..."

Doctor consulting a textbook.

"Frank, is that you?"

covid mask - Lend me your ears

Dancing Doctor

"I think that's the newest machine replacing the new machine we just installed."

"Is this 'No medical student left behind' diploma the same as a regular diploma?"

"You may enter, doctor, if you can read this prescription."

Coronavirus

'My medical school believed laughter is the best medicine.

'Hey! Who removed the appendix from my dictionary medical procedures!'

'Now don't be deceived; I'm making this look very easy.'

'Is it worth it? Do I really want to give all this up for a career in cardiac catheterization?'

'Well...all right...go ahead.'

Doctor surrounded by notes.

Medical School Equivalency Diploma

"The problem is either in the yolk or the eggwhite."

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."