Graduate Students Gifts

It's a Millennial Generation Life off!

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

"Make a lot of money."

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

A boy is sat at a desk, with five plaques implying different qualifications he has earned from using social media.

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

Good Luck!

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

Thank you for not doing research that has already been done.

'Kids, today, Xerf brought in a planet that he found. Now if we look at it closely under the microscope, you can still see it's inhabitants scrambling around.'

'It's time to move out when Mom says...'

'I still want to be a cowboy.'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

'Well, if he can't be a Minuteman, he can be a minutedog.'

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

Personnel. I've heard of "magna cum laude" and "summa cum laude," but I've never heard of a person graduating "persona non grata." (Published originally on June 3, 1981.)

'I took a couple of years off after college to work on my smirk.'

"Don't blame me for the grade, blame Google's algorithms."

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

'I wasted a lot of time in graduate school to get this job.'

Good Luck!

'I'm doing a school report on 'the aging process,' Dad -- can I interview you?'

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

The Janitor at the Harvard University Alumni Reunion is one of the Gang.

"Before you grade my test, keep in mind, my dream is to become a wealthy doctor, just like my available father"

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

'Does my head look big in this?'

"No, Einstein's theory of relativity isn't, 'don't marry your cousin.'"