Graceful Klutz Pillows

A Fall From Grace

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"From the gentleman at the end of the barre."

"Well, he promised you the moon and stars."

'Does this thing get channel four.'

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

"Ma'am, you don't have an ant problem. They're coffee grounds."

"On. More. Try."

"It's a recipe from the 'Anti-Christ' cookbook."

My old recipes have so many food stains they're practically scratch and sniff.

"Mrs. Simpson would like the recipe for your 'delicious steak pie', dear. Do you think you could dig the packet out of the recycling tub?"

"I warned you not to use parts from the microwave oven, to mend the electric blanket...."

Sleeping Beauty's Wedding

'Sorry about that - Lenny accidentally used jumping beans.'

"Rosalie's signature chicken dish is simplicity itself."

The Coordination Committee meets. . .

"For what he is about to receive may the dog be truly thankful."

'To her...the basic 4 food groups are canned, frozen, fast and delivered.'

"Cooking Tip # 23: If at first you don't succeed, feed it to the cat."

'So why do you need a ladder to eat a pancake'

"What better way to start your day than to eat and pray before we play!"

'And I've teamed that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager.'

'We'll have to eat out tonight -- I misplaced a decimal point in the cookbook.'

'Did you follow a recipe book for this dish?'

Graceful, for a big man....

'Why can't I make my pastry light?'

'Wow- you're one helluva great cook! Even the stuff you ordered from the delivery store is burned!'

'Trying to eat her dinners is the only exercise I get.'

"I'm here to fix the lasagne."

Ballerina and the light switch.