Graceful Eater T-Shirts

Young child saying grace

"Bless these chops, these peas, and these potatoes, both actual and couch."

"We thank you for the food we are about to receive. . . even the spinach."

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

"From the gentleman at the end of the barre."

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

"There are no croutons. I use tater tots on my salad."

Analysis of Beauty - Plate II.

Treble

'Lord, we thank thee for the bounty we're about to receive.'

"For what he is about to receive may the dog be truly thankful."

Sleeping Beauty's Wedding

Boy who has eaten oysters and grown fat

"I'll have a gluten-free, hypoallergenic vegan cookie with whipped hand-sanitizer topping."

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

'No, that is not a balanced diet.'

Ballet shoes balancing on a telephone wire

Meat Department

Diners sit in high chairs, wear bibs and eat baby food. Man says: 'I love this place, it's just so retro.'

"I quit worrying. I've gone 100% non-non and completely free-free."

Ballerina

"Stop playing with your food and eat your dinner!"

Art and Sport: Ballerina playing basketball.

Arabesque ballet dancer.

"The good thing about eating a melon is that you wash your face at the same time!"

"First the good news, there's no longer any point in you eating broccoli."

'Joe's Junk Food.' 'At least he's honest.'

"Everyone, stop looking delicious. The vegans are back and that tofurkey jerky won't keep them back much longer."

'You think ideas are contained in food?'

"I have a date with Gregorio. We're going dancing. I like doing things...that make me feel younger!"

Food for thought vendor serves think tank employees.

Recipes from the Revised Senior Citizen Cookbook

"I'm worried that not everyone knows I'm a vegan!"