Governance Parody Fan Pillows

"Who named him emperor!?"

'Not a word to Alfred, but the spare bedroom is worth losing the fourteen pounds!'

'If Mom says no, you ask Dad -- it's called the 'checks and balances' system.'

"Other folks have to pay taxes, too, Mr. Herndon, so would you please spare us the dramatics!"

"OSHA is going to hear about this!"

Federal Departument of Edutainment.

"A man threatens to destroy town with army of turtles after dispute with city hall. Local authorities initiate a shell-ter in place in preparation for the noc-turtle invasion."

Two men who work for The Federal Department of Bureaucracy look at chart 'Things to Pretend to do Today'

"Sure, meritocracies are fine, but why take the chance?"

Doctors to treat insomnia with sleep app rather than pills

Mr Pickwick and Sam in the Attorney's Office

"As soon as we finish our drinks we should get ourselves elected and implement all the wildly simplistic solutions to the problems we have carelessly defined here!"

'My error, sir. On the phone I thought you said 'venture' capitalist.'

'Why retire? Working a nonfunctioning - government is just like being retired.'

I.R.S.: 'Notice: The rumor that we have merged with homeland security is untrue!'

Management of the Sahara falls to the NHS...

"That's untrue that I suffered moral decay! I started out corrupt!"

Federal Bureau of Management and Budget - Visit our new website easy.comeasy.gov

Applesauce, pea soup, candied yams.

"I'll find you some candy, but first tell me how you got past the Secret Service."

'Hey, wait a second, You haven't filled this resignation form out in triplicate,'

'You need to stop employees flushing money down the toilet!'

'...And before I knew it, I'd delegated ALL my authority!'

The bad news is that we lost the war -- the good news is that the king of France has agreed to make it two out of three!

'And now the news in briefs.'

"There you are!"

'I'm sorry, it's a new goverment law - I'm not allowed to serve anyone over eighteen stone.'

Federal Bureau of Indian Affairs and Federal Bureau of Cowboy Affairs

'You've got to cure my snoring, Doc! -- I'm afraid I'll lose my job with the Government!'

Shop called "Drink'n'Smoke'n'Shoot" with a sign in their front window that reads "A.T.F. Approved".

'I was a Government bureaucrat, and I showed initiative.

'Our best exit strategy is to privatize the military and send in mercenaries.'

F.D.A. Raid