Gourmet Pizza Gifts

"Did you order the, eye of newt and bat's wing topping?"

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

The wonderful world of cheese.

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

'I'm majoring in communication and minoring in pizza delivery - What about you?'

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

French wine

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

His Her Cakes

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

Menu Dating

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

"Deep-dish pizza calls for deep-glass beer."

"They always throw us stale bread, so I've decided to bake my own, fresh break..."

"It comes with a small Greek salad."

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

'It's my favorite.'

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer