Gourmet Owl Gifts

"Do you want the rest of this mouse? It tastes gamey to me."

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

LAY ZEE FUK

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

The wonderful world of cheese.

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

La Table

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

It turns out they don't go together so well,

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

'Needs salt!'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

The Main Types of Cheese

French wine

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

Too much cilantro

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

To do before Saturday...

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."