Gossip Guardian Pillows

'We're going to have to put a stop to all the gossiping by the water cooler.' (water cooler spreading gossip).

"I'd speak more if I heard anything worth repeating."

Water-cooler chat's not secret

"I've had custom reading glasses made that blot out the words 'brexit' and 'royal.'"

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

'She's so put together!'

Annual run-off at the mouth.

'Yak, yak, yak.'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

A little bird told me...

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

Men gossiping

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

'It's a fake - but all the hanging around the water cooler is down 57%!'

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"If you have any gossip, tell me now - she could come back ay second."

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

"Our next contestant is Mildred and her specialist subject is "Other People's Business""

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

JET (Part I)

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

"Can you keep a secret?"

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

"Water cooler talk stations."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'