Gore Gourmand Gifts

"That's one t-bone steak for you sir, and a bowl of blood and guts for your zombie friend."

The wonderful world of cheese.

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

Grand Escargot at a Parisian Eatery.

'He was hosting a business dinner for 300. Those were his last words.'

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

"Perhaps we should cleanse our palates first?"

Just one more choccy...

A London gent abroad

Tomorrow we'll cheer the fourth of July! Picnics with families mean hot dogs to buy! Flags will be waving so proudly up high! And fireworks displays will light the night sky which Frank will miss due to way too much pie! Pie Eating Contest!

"It's fondue night!"

'Mmm... the bouquet flickers around the nose like butterflies sweetly scented by the shower from a the milk of a goddesses breasts.'

'Don't worry, Sir. Most of our customers get indigestion when they see the bill.'

"Try and push the eye of newt and wing of bat casserole."

"Gimme a double burger between two burgers. And hold the lettuce; it only dilutes the experience."

Dijon Vu

"Of course this is a pizza! Man, I've always been a rebel!"

'According to my count, he sticked 23, gloved 18 and ate 5.'

'You could use more fiber in your diet; go sow a few wild oat brans.'

"Love the cheese - not so sure about the presentation."

No matter where. . . everyone gravitates toward the kitchen.

The experience was exhilarating. You could eat like a pig and weigh nothing.

"Cemetery Pie"

Capturing a Cook

The four basic food groups: Dry, Moist, Biscuit, Bone.

"The book, How to Serve Man! It's. . . It's a cook book, filled with recipes that use MSG and transfats!"

"Now this is what I call a thanksgiving break."

"If I'm billing six hundred dollars an hour, lunch just cost me $ 638.75."

'What d'you say to a massive Szechuan-style wok fry-up before we start?'

"I found out something last night that just totally destroyed my worldview."