Goodwill Committee Member Gifts

'I am literally allergic to positivity.'

'Hanson - committee of four.'

'What we need is a decision, not more foot-dragging.'

"The state of graduates literacy levels is shoking and both my colleegs agrree that there maths isn't much better."

'It may not be our usual business lunch, but it will sure impress the hell out of the budget committee.'

"Hold everything! I just thought up a terrific loophole!"

'There's an absence of leadership in this authority,we need to explore the possibility of thinking about setting up a sub-committee to look into it.'

'Okay, let's go over this again: You tell me your great ideas, I repeat them back to you, then you tell me I have a great idea and I get all the credit for it!'

"There's no need to go round the table - I know who I am."

Plain English group.

'If at first you don't succeed, appoint a committee and let them worry about it.'

"I guess the point I'm trying to make is, calling the committee on Progress and Evolution a bunch of know-it-all nincompoops might have felt good when you said it, but..."

"The vote is tied. Half of us think the proposed plan is astoundingly asinine, and the other half finds it stupid beyond belief. Let's try to find a middle ground here, people!"

"The Board just wants to be sure you're well supported."

"The steering-committee three are we. Run it by us, and we'll see."

"I volunteer for the Samaritans. I tried to phone in sick this morning but they talked me out of it."

'Excellent - it's unanimous!'

'Yeah, but would you want to have a beer with him.'

"I suppose the first thing to do is form an escape committee."

Senate ethics committee - no fatties!

'You may be chairman of the board, but the ethics committee would still like to talk to you about your trip to Vegas.'

"For your information, officer, I was not ‘texting’ – I was reviewing candidate applications for fellowship grants!"

"Thanks a bunch. I'll just run these by our committee and pass them along."

"Does the co-op board have any idea when the elevators will be replaced?"

'So, after much wailing and gnashing of teeth, the financial report is approved.'

Hudibras - 9 - The committee.

'I think we should form a committee to look into this 'individual initiative' thing.'

"Ever notice how everyone's nice this time of year? Kids behave. Neighbors, friends, relatives - even workers at the office - smile more. The mailman has a friendly wave, folks seem to go out of their way to be nice..."

'We have 10 billion dollars sitting around. Let's give it to the country that calls the United States the most names.'

'Community wok?'

'Mr.Shumway here is our visiting ethicist.'

The Academic Brain, showing parts: teach, write, do research, and (the largest part) serve on committees.

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this committee.'

'All those in favor of making more loans, raise your hands.' (staff's hands are tied to chairs).

"We're an oversight committee, but we do it more in the sense of overlooking."