Godlike Gift Giver Gifts

'Eve is a nice addition, except you inadvertently created a lot of sexual tension.'

Grace For Flies

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

"From the gentleman at the end of the barre."

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

celebrating a birth.

'They're dog roses!'

'You got anything that says I put some thought into this gift?'

Christmas Presents.

'If you really loved me you would have bought me flowers.'

'Yeah, yeah, very cute... she couldn't have just sent me an e-card?'

Psychiatrist says: 'Oh, no! Not another fruit cake?'

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

Love.

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

Birthday Racing Car

Valentines Balloons

'Do I have to give thanks for all the spinach, or just the bite I'm going to eat?'

'And that,and that,and that...'

'Let's open presents Christmas Eve AND morning. That way Christmas lasts for TWO days.'

"It's not so bad! But I DO have to sleep on my side. . .2

Saying Grace.

'I don't need to know what it is when it's on sale.'

'Awww, isn't that nice: This one says 'PS: Love to Rudolph!''

'Aha! You can tell Dottie and the kids I didn't forget their presents!'

A feminist Christmas.

'A globe warming party?...Guys, you shouldn't have!'

'Don't worry -- I used a bond issue.'

'The farmer's kids asked me to wake them early tomorrow: It's Christmas day!'

'If you ask me, toys are getting far too realistic!'

'You've agreed to work Sundays, haven't you!'