Globe-trotting Critic Gifts

"We'd like a four star hotel, but with some interesting poverty nearby."

Sign: 'Welcome to Fernbanks. Beneath our quaint Norman Rockwell-ish exterior beats a big-box chain store heart, ready to sell out at the drop of a hat.'

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

Religion & Economics.

The Family Joules: Part 7

"It's all good – but some of it is better."

World Domination

Sport and Politics section of the newspaper exploding.

"Emotionally, I'm checking three bags."

"You forgot his tail."

Emotional Baggage Check In.

'If this is a non-stop flight, how do we get off?'

"Our house wine is abominable."

Tourist

Two kids caught playing dots & boxes on a Damien Hirst painting, spelling the word 'so-so'.

"Doctor Finkelstein is here to ensure you're not carrying any excess emotional baggage on board."

"Our flight's been diverted to Frankfurt - but remember, it is better to travel than to arrive."

"The reason why U.S. time is behind English time is because England was discovered first..."

An Easter Island statue with a camera (showing how tourism affects the destinations of the tourists).

The world toilet.

'Luggage is luggage, sir -- just try to be happy with what you've got.'

China Syndrome.

Sue Gray Report

Beggers belief.

London on £50 a meal

'I like to relax before my business flights.'

Social comment on the time-honoured tradition of attaching a Just Married sign to the newlyweds car

If symptoms persist sue your doctor.

'We had an all-inclusive-holiday. Bad weather, lousy food, arrogant waiters, crappy hotel and outrageous prices - all that was included.'

Two men with different globes, modern man is running on the globe.

Bogga Springs - Twinned with Geneva

"That's what comes from being a multinational. The company picnic will be in Terra del Fuego."

Check those blueprints again --- I don't think were supposed to put the freezer on both the top and the bottom.

North Korean H-Bomb and North Korean A-Hole

"It's amazing how some clothes never go out of style."