Globetrotting Analyst Gifts

Sport and Politics section of the newspaper exploding.

US and the EU

The Family Joules: Part 5

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

"Arr, we found your luggage, Captain."

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

'Today, emerging market funds rose on news the American dream is alive and well in Thailand, Singapore, China. . .'

Religion & Economics.

"On the contrary. I think the Carribbean countries have a great many education practices that are worth studying."

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.

World Domination

"Emotionally, I'm checking three bags."

The Family Joules: Part 8

Buddha Statue: Buy Low, Sell High, Stay Diversified.

Emotional Baggage Check In.

"Please remember to check for any personal problems you may have left behind."

'We don't have a GPS or any maps, so this is the best I could do.'

"We're all nuts about the Pacific Rim."

Tourist

"Our flight's been diverted to Frankfurt - but remember, it is better to travel than to arrive."

'Which vacation destination do you prefer: a country where Americans are feared, idolized, envied or hated? Or shall we just let that be a surpriese?'

'And this is the small print in your travel insurance...'

The world toilet.

'A cruise by air, sir, is called a 'tour'.'

Thousands of customers stranded when major travel firm goes out of business.

China Syndrome.

Beggers belief.

"My job traveled abroad, so I can't."

"Harry has come up with a great idea - we hold the shareholder's meeting in Timbuctoo."

Two men with different globes, modern man is running on the globe.

'He gets like that at these out of town conventions.'

"It's amazing how some clothes never go out of style."

'Can you believe that seven women, that's 83.5% of females in the 21-50 age band who are present, think I'm boring?'

Pack lightly