Globe-trotter In Business Gifts

"Harry has come up with a great idea - we hold the shareholder's meeting in Timbuctoo."

My God, I need to fart.

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

"Arr, we found your luggage, Captain."

"Excuse me, dear...the rickshaw phone...."

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

'Today, emerging market funds rose on news the American dream is alive and well in Thailand, Singapore, China. . .'

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.

Travel Scenes

'They gave me a choice...they would either off-shore my job, or I could keep my job if I moved to India.'

"I picked this one up in France while my wife had her hip replaced."

World Domination

Australasia.

Sport and Politics section of the newspaper exploding.

World economy

The Cuban government studies the possiblity of allowing residents to travel outside the country as tourists.

"We're all nuts about the Pacific Rim."

What the globe in Christopher Columbus' classroom must have looked like.

Tourist

"Why are you cancelling your trip to Switzerland?"

'We don't have a GPS or any maps, so this is the best I could do.'

"Please remember to check for any personal problems you may have left behind."

Beefsteak travel, hamburger budget.

'Which vacation destination do you prefer: a country where Americans are feared, idolized, envied or hated? Or shall we just let that be a surpriese?'

'And this is the small print in your travel insurance...'

'Luggage is luggage, sir -- just try to be happy with what you've got.'

Thousands of customers stranded when major travel firm goes out of business.

'A cruise by air, sir, is called a 'tour'.'

China Syndrome.

"I'm looking for a holiday destination that's reasonably open minded about contagion."

Golfer going through customs

"My job traveled abroad, so I can't."

Man Puts His Seatbelt on for a Literary Journey