Glamorous Guru Gifts

Complete Makeover

"I have the smokey eyes look. Can the doctor still give me an eye exam?"

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"You're solemates!"

"How do I love thee….? Let me count the ways…" "I'm going to want a recount."

Words of Love

Tunnel of Temporary Infatuation

I'm putting all my eggs in one basket.

"Listen to me, Nathan. Chicks love bad boys."

'It WAS rather unkind of you to hide his bottle-opener, Mrs Jones.'

The Love Psychologists

JET (Part I)

"Dearly Besequinned . . . "

' You're wonderful.' 'I know.'

An evening with Stanley Bucholtz, relationship MD,,,tonight: 'Just ONE evening,,,'

Tunnel of Love and the Tunnel of Mutual Respect and Admiration.

Bird reading '1001 pickup lines' - 'I'm getting ready for mating season.'

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

"Arouse Me!"

'Two Mr. Wrongs don't make a Mr. Right.'

My husband doesn´t understand you.

"We can deal with many heart related issues apart from 'a heart torn asunder by the meretricious behavior of a mendacious lover.'"

"I could afford a degree in broadcast journalism, but not the makeup."

"And, finally, do you, Don, or do you, Allison, have a problem with any of this?"

Sculptor's chippings

Separations.

"I feel I'm losing touch with the unrealistic view I have of him."

'We've entered the 'password sharing' phase of our relationship!'

'The gentleman at the end of the bar would like to buy you an aphrodisiac.'