Gift Planning Pillows

'We should've just dropped off our lists and taken our chances. But no, you had to bring a lawyer into the negotiations.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Christmas Tree

'What do you do with the time you save?'

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

"Cards to remind people that you still haven’t gotten a thank you note from them"

"From the gentleman at the end of the barre."

The wife whisperer.

Say it with flowers

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

'They're dog roses!'

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

'You got anything that says I put some thought into this gift?'

"Gift"

'It must be good chocolate for six bucks a box.'

Santa in the Sky: Happy Holidays!

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

'Too pricey? Perhaps you wish to see something in macaroni and spray paint?'

Love.

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

CEO.

'As a token of friendship we present to you this sacred albino fawn.' 'We sailed all the way across the Atlantic Ocean, and all you have is light deer?!'

"Shouldn't have, you really."

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

Tipping Pain Chart

Bad gifts

"I hate it..."

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

Valentines Balloons

'Well, I'll try, but cheese seems to be the 'must have gift' this year.'

'And that,and that,and that...'

'I'm huggable!'

'Let's open presents Christmas Eve AND morning. That way Christmas lasts for TWO days.'