Gift For A Sibling T-Shirts

'I have here a virus so deadly it could destroy the world...Oh, darn that cat!'

At the Museum

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

Boy and Bear and Monster

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

Magnet School. A "magnet school"? Won't that mess up the computers?

"I don't care if you saw this in a western..."

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

"Better luck next time, kid."

'I've been told before that I'm very mature for a three year old.'

I think you meant to huff 'n' puff at the next house over.

'I'm concerned that the children may be playing too rough.'

The Charge of the Kids

6th Grade Do-You-Own Research Fair

Fade to black...

A balloon vendor hands a child his only 'good' face out of many,less than desireable faces.

"I don't get it either, but my mom keeps telling me to hang up the phone, so I do it to make her happy."

'I've been watering myself by taking showers. How come I'm not growing as tall as your plants?'

'I don't like that one. . . how about the one with the cute smile.'

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

Reflected Glory

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

'A boy? Come on, Mom, you can do better than that!'

'Oh, boy - stereo!'

'The real story behind the Princess and the Pea.' A queen saying to a little girl eating, 'Eat all your peas or else you'll have to put them under your mattress.'

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- it's hard to believe we're related.'

'Mum, she pulled my mane!'

"Good news. Your mother is pregnant, so, we won't be mortgaging your future."

"No, William. This is your new little brother, Christopher. Not William 2.0."

Four balloons