Ghoul Groupie Pillows

“Sorry, we don’t accept the living dead.”

'Can I sleep over in the real world? Please, please, please, please.'

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

Zombie standup

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

'I may not know about DNA, but I sure as hell know about recombinant.'

'On second thought dear, I think it's your turn to make breakfast.'

'Gee, where are all the crowds this year?'

'You said I should check back with you if I didn't get any better. . .'

"...The Spirits are out at the moment, but if you'd like to leave a message...."

"Deal! I'll introduce you to Dian Fossey and you'll introduce me to Jane Goodall!"

'Now that's just low-down mean.'

Oh, oh... I detect traces of tree nuts... where's my epipen?

"In the Game of Life, my son, the fix is in."

Goblin.

Artwork in a gallery still has wet paint.

'But I only came to Oxford because I heard I could wear a gown!'

Cinema nasties

"Blood bank robbery...you?"

Athena

"Mikey and Bubbles: Gorilla songwriters"

'Would sir like to start with the hors d'oeuvres, or just go to the main corpse?'

"I have two children by a previous tour."

The Terror Of Folkenstein

"Well, you shouted come on the five dog!"

'Oh, come on. We just need one more body. Please die.'

"I'm dating a professional goalkeeper..."

"Watch out! You almost got me!"

"Do you want to swipe left or right?"

"So how does that eightfold path get us back on the Garden State?"

'This is depressing, the Pro Bowl had more hits than my website.'

Mob Misfortune Cookies 'There's a gun pointed at your right now' 'You will take one for the team soon.' 'Leave the gun, take the eggroll.'

"Frankly, I only truly realized how unconditionally my master loved me when I stopped winning races..."

'Hey! - Don't you meditate when I'm talking to you!'