Ghost Fanatic Gifts

"Where's your candy."

'Yes...you gave me quite a start!'

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Evolution.

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

Ghost School.

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

Horror Stories.

'Halloween is just around the corner, kids. Have you decided what are you going to wear?'

Do it! Go into the woods alone!...

'I'm sorry, we don't serve spirits.'

"Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!"

"I loved the bit where you hid under the seat."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

'There's an imposter among us!'

'Relax, we're letting you go. Your insurance didn't go through.'

'Egad! It's the ghosts of sanity past!'

'Is there a lady in the audience whose late husband says he never did put up that shelf?'

"The Ruin is under new management. Specters will manage wraiths, shades and spirits. All others report to be spook resources. Bonuses will be based on team work and synergy."

'I'm not saying I won't eat left-brained people's brains, but I prefer right.'

Pokemon Get Lost

"I've got the creepiest costume for Halloween! It's an alien-like creature with hypnotic powers...that'll suck your brains out and turn you into a mindless zombie!"

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

"I feel all tingly."

'It's only fair Geraldine. I had to meet your parents.'

'It's only the library ghost - he was a great poet but a failed novelist.'

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

Born of the Dead

'Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!'

'I'm quite impressed with your bloodthirstiness but we won't be able to offer you health benefits eternally.'

"Lately, I've become more spiritual, and less religious."

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."